chapter 12

i miss writing so much, adre 6awalt bas methel ma gelt its ramadhaan i cant post wayed:( 

yala enjoy xo 

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dhari: enshallah wala ana ga3ed a7awel w ma tga9roun keelkoum;*** 

me: al3afou!

dhari: ;*

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"t9adeg 3ad, men hathel kelhoum ehya alwa7eda ele 7abait'ha.. wala 7asait 9ej t7bny w meste3eda tsawy ay shay 3ashany!! wgefat ma3ay lama makan a7ad ma3ay.. mu fake nafs althanen.. hal 3 months ele maraw kanaw a93ab sh'hour eb 7ayaty kelha.. mrait eb kte2ab, ta3athabt w met yala 9ert a7san bshway.."

dr. hassan: w bas? hathe kel al8e9a? 

dhari: ehh dector.. w ele tawa gelta akher shay! bas abeek tgouly shasawe tukfa

dr. hassan: shouf dhari, al7een enta mu t7eebha? goulhaa w 9adgne bt9er a7san.. tgrab men rabik.. 9al rak3tain etha t'thayagt.. egra qur2an!! w e7med rabik enek terakt shaghlat al le3eb..

dhari: enshallah dector.. mashkour w ma tga9err.. yaalah ma3asa alsalama w nshoufik eb almw3ed alyaay..

dr. hassan: enshallah..

methel ma tshoufun.. men kether altha86 ele ta3arthtla gemt arou7 7ag dector nafse.. 7aayll ta2azaamt.. kela ga3ed eb baitna maby ashouf a7ad.. bas fe wa7da kanat kela tyena baitna.. shahad, ehh shahad! ma khalatny brou7y! kel yomain tyee baitna w teg3ad 3end thou7a w shway teg3ad weyaay.. agoulaha kel shay.. w tesma3 p.s: ترى احلى شي تسوونا حق الي تحبون انكم تسمعون لهم.. تحسسونم انكم مهتمين.. والله مانبي شي غير انكم تسمعون لنا.. *back to the story: ma tgoul shay wala et'thamar.. kent ashouf 7ubha ley b3younha.. w akh 3younha 7ail fath7atha! 7uby laha kel youm yzeed.. w enshallah bas ou9al baitna badeg 3alaiha.. w bagoul laha kel shay..  

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raghad's [•p.o.v•]

"yala yala khal9eny thelfay, jedamy yala la bln3aal"

me: shway shway wala ga3d t3awrne khala9:'( wakher 3any!!

"LA T3ALEN 9OUTICH 3ALAY FAHMA!!!!!!" 

me: enshallah..

"ga9ben 3alaich tgoulen enshallah!!!"

*my life is just a mess, i hate my dad! i H A T E him.. weird right? haha. i just dont know why he doesnt treat me well, im his  

daughter for gods sake!!:( ma a7ad yadry 3an ele y9er feny.. kela 3abalhoum ene mestansaa.. i always fake smiles w it works :D < im faking smile rn [right now] haha.. i also love a guy who doesnt love me back, from 2 years ago. how sad?:( and he doesnt know that i exist a9laaaan:D & i have a friend.. she cuts.. but i love her.. 

-one day..

me: khala9 re7maayy nafsich bass!!!

"raghod fehmaayy i cant!! 9a3eebbb walaa!!"

 

me: en ma wagaftayy i'll cut walaa.

"habla entay? 3abalich sahel? tara y3aweer 7ail!!"

me: eeeh men 9eje, okay etha y3awer laish you cut? esthbal? 

"bas please close this subject." 

me: i wont, fehmay i care about you!!!

"okay im sorry raghad bas ma agdar."

me: khala9 i'll cut men 9eje :D 

"dont."

me: wagfay 3ashan i dont cut.

"ma aby."

me: fine then i'll cut :* 

"huuuuufffff." 

w 9arly 4 months.. it hurts.. LIKE JAD.. you lose blood, a lot of blood.. sometimes i cry.. lol.. ele tgoul shallah 7adha.. i hate my life+ my best friend tsawe hal shay.. laish ma asaweh? w ashouf ena yray7ne.. a6ale3 kel ele eb galbe 3ala my skin.. bas ele 9ej y3awer lama obouy y6gny w y7oush almukan ele i cut fehh.. hnyyy amout 3aad.. w ele tes2al laish y3amlne chthy cause kan yaby walad bedaly ana.. fa gam y7e6 kel 7areta fene!:'D wow.

"im depressed, i need my pen, i need my note book.. i want them so bad, i miss writing about what i feel &yes when i write i feel SO MUCH BETTER." 

تسأل عنه.. 

ولا يسأل عنها..

تحادثه..

ولا يحادثها..

تشتاق اليه..

و تعلم انه لا يشتاق اليها.. 

تسأل قلبها دائماً..

"اخ يا قلبي.. لماذا انت شقيٌ هكذا؟ تحب احداً لا يحبك.. وتعلم بذلك.. ولكنك لا تريد الانسحاب.. انسحب.."

ترد لواقعها.. تحاول الانساحب حِفاضاً على ما تبقى من كرامتها.. وعلى جمله ابيها المعتاده..

"كوني عزيزةَ نفسٍ تصبحين غاليه في عيونهم.." 

*this one is for my j <3

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3azam's [•p.o.v•]

me: w kamlna 2 months together! wala 7ady mestanees mattkhayleen shkether!! 

"3azaaam!! wala ana akthaar<3 alah la y7rmne menek jaddd.." 

me: 7abeebty entayy;** ameen wala menech ya rou7yy, shoufay tara alyoum baayeekouum bag3ad weya f9ail fa meray chenech ma tadreen..=))

"benawer baitna walaa!<3 7ayaaak! lool 3ayar enshallaah banzel=))" 

ehh ehh ana w njoud n7eb ba3ath w kel shay 9ar bser3a bser3aa w im planning to marry her lama atkharaj enshallah!<3

-flashbacks- 17-6-2012.

the day i'll never forget.. 

me: njouuuddd a7eeeeebichhh!!!!!!! yakhy 7esay wala a7ebich

njoud: lol 7abetek al3afya

me: men 9eje ana a7ebich shfeech!!! 

njoud: lol okay? 

me: ya kerhech please fakraayy!!! 

njoud: enshallah enshallah:: yala bye now!

me: rabe ya7fthech.. 

"3AZAM BAGOULIK SHAY"

me: 3youn 3azam? rou7 3azam? galb 3azam? entay bas amry tdaleelaay?

"A7EBIK."

me: NJOUD WALA ENE 6AYER MEN ALFAR7A!!! wala ma adre shgoul a7eebich 7ayl 7ayl.!!!!!!!!!

njoud: hahaha akthar wala:$ 

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comment please eb ay mukan tabouna xxo 

 

chapter 11.

hey guys xx

i just wanted to say that i wont post eb rmthan.. aw yemkin i post 1 or 2 chapters blkther.. cause wala loya masyad f6our ghabgaa and wayed ashyaa2;** sorryyy x

enjoyy :*

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njoud: tara ga3ed tkar3ne please ta7acha!

me: njoud shoufay ele bagoulaa al7eeen ma adre shloun sawaita w abech ma t3a9been please

njoud: okay yala goul!

me: njoud ana ....

njoud: khaaaal9nyy!!!!!!!!

me: sheftaay salfat almsgs?

njoud: 3eraaaaftt mnuuu???? e7leeef?

me: mu tharoury a3aref..

njoud: laish mu tharourryy? mu tgoul ana baasawe kel shaayy?????????

me: la2ana ana ehwa alshakh9..

njoud: entaaa????? 3azaam entaa? men 9ejeek welaa ga3ed etgashmaar?

me: ............

njouud: meenn 9ejeeek entaaa??? meen 9ejeeek? walaa 7araaam 3alaaaykk!!!!!!!

me: njoud khalenyy atkalam w agoul laish..

njoud: w 3endik raad ba3aaad??? waalaa gwaaat 3aaaainn!!!!!! la tfaahmne shaay bas tadryyy shkaan y9er fenee lama agraa hal msgs?? taadreee????? wala kent atga6a3 men alkhouf ma 3anee ma sawait walaa shaaayy kent weyaaa ahaale eb baitnaa mafrouth a7es bl amaan bas ma a7ess feeh, kent chnyy wa7daa eb ay la7tha mumkeen tmout!!!!!! dakhalt 7ayatyy chthy faj2aa yet alzwara chek booom salfat hal msgs w laaa meneek ent ba3aaad, khala9 jad alah ysam7ek.. w latkhaaaf mara7 asawe shayy bas ana hgetek rayal btsa3dne bas 6ala3t 3aks ele tewa8aa3taa ma agoul ela shukraan la2anik 5arabt mukantik eb nafsek.. ekhte9art 3alay ansak w at3adak eb shoulaa w tara aldenyaa dawaraa yaa 3azaam...;p 

3azam: adry wala adre ele sawaitaaa ghala6 adre w ana met7asef gad sha3ar rase ma kent adre blthab6 laish kent asawe chthy walaa ma adree, yemkin kent a7es enkoum a7san mene? yemkin la2any abech bas many gader ou9alich? yemkin w yemkin w yemkin.. 

njoud: 3azam shrayek netkalam ba3daain la2any jaaad maly khelg ele sme3ta mkafeneey..

me: aseef njoud.. w rabyy aseef!!!!! sam7eenyy tukfaaainn!!!!!!!!!!!! 

njoud: khalaa9 basss ent ele tukfa eskeet!!!! byee..

&she left.. wala ene ghaabyyy ghabyy ghaabyy!!!!!!! astaheel astaaheeel wala a7san..

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thou7a's [•p.o.v•]

ma adre shasawe wala, a7achy shahoud wela ma a7achehaa.. fashalny hal dethwy ele 3ende.. waaayyyyyy wayyyy enzayn laish my friends? laish ysawe chthy? akh bas wede a3aref laish.. 

dhari: thou7a goumay ba7achech..  

me: shtabe ba3ad? mu nage9 ela tgoul abe raghad w khala9 takmel alsalfaa

dhari: wala mu wagtech thou7a ana yaay a9ale7 kel shay sawaitaah!!

me: shet9ale7? 3amel enta? la la e7em etghashmar okay gouly shbet9ale7?

dhari: chub chub mu kafu w rabe

me: la la khala9 asfa eg3ad shtabe?

dhari: abe 9amoun bu6a6 ketchup, ya3ne shabe bala? bagoulich shay

me: hahahaha tharef ekhouy, yala goul

dhari: sem3aaay.. he told me EVERYTHING.. from A to Z 3an rawan w albanat &shahad..

me: ya3ne 9erft player men hal rawan alzeft 9a7? 

dhari: .....

me: shouf dhari, enta rayal w 3aref ma9la7at rou7ik mu yahel.. bas hal sabab kelesh kelesh mu me8ne3.. w etha hadtek shfeha ya3ne? tsawe 7aram akthar? en6er 4 sneen ela ent metkharej w mutwathef ba3ad w thek alsa3a tzawaj bas wala 7aram enek tge9 3al banat chthyy!!! 5af rabek!!!

dhari: adry wala adry bas mane gader ta3awadt khalaa9, bas shahad galatly ena she'll help me

me: sheft shloun? waaala maku methel shahad ba3d ele saweteh w lel7en tgoul she'll help you..

dhari: i'll fix everything just give me time.

me: yala nshouff

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njoud's [•p.o.v•]

"Believing is hard. 

When your trust is broken.

Loving is hard.

When it has no faith.

I do regret.

All the times the we shared.

I am shocked.

With what you did.

I thought you loved me.

I thought you cared.

But you do not, unless it had been fate.

You betrayed the hope i had in you.

You lost the things that i had felt.

If i could only turn back i wouldn't have met you. 

You hurt me badly with what you did.

A few simple words caused our end. 

And i thought my love to you had started. 

But it was not, and i needed up startled."

i cant believe this. like seriously..

how could you do this to me?..  wela a whatsapp notification interrupt my thoughts.. it was from an unknown number.. great ba3ad nag9ny anaa???

the unknown number: hala njoud

me: khayr? mnu?

the unknown number: ana thari ekho thou7a..

me: dhaari? shtaabee? wala ma tst7eeeyy ba3ad yaay tkaalmnee? feek shay ent? mu 9a7y??

dhari: please njoud ana yay a3tether w a9ale7 kel shaay.. 

me: ohh zain 7asait 3ala damek?;p tadry shsawait entaa.. awalan fashalt ekhtek almaskeena ele mehya gadra tkalmna, athneen khalayt wa7da men a3az rab3y tabchy 3ashanek laa w maskeena 3ala neyaatha ehyaa ma taadry.. bas rou7 rabe ysam7eek.. w ana msaam7teek.. w atmana t9ale7 kel shay w twakher 3an hal ashya2 w kelnaa hnyy etha bghayt shaay..

dhari: enshallah wala ana ga3ed a7awel w ma tga9roun keelkoum;*** 

me: al3afou!

dhari: ;*

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comment pleasee;**

love you all xo

chapter "10"

this post is dedicated to @malfaris_ love you x

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njoud's [•p.o.v•]

kelhoum ra7aw w ma buga ela raghad, she's sleeping over\o/ yaaaaaayyy!

 

me: raghaida ana banam 7ady dekht! goodnight w 6afay al light ele bara yam dar faisal etha btnamen..

raghad: zayn namay w ana banzel ashouf tv bl9ala weya a7ad ya shanty ya f9ail ashouf 

me: kay thelfay

rghaid nzelat ta7att.. w ge3adt ashouf my twitter.. 

a guy caught my eyes.. i cant describe him.. he is flawless jad.. brown eyes.. shanab, long hair that looks good on him..  His name is khaled.. i stalked him then nemt.. 

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raghad's [•p.o.v•]

 

g3adt ta7at bl9ala a6ale3 tv.. 

dakhal f9ail w ana 7ayl mendamja blfilm.. 

fai9al: HEY ENTAY

YA HABLA YA RAGHAD

RAGHAD W WAY3A

me: ha ha ha shfeeek t7een? bale3 radio? 

faisal: la bas shfeech ga3da brou7ich wain njoud?

me: nayma 5u e5dek deyaya nafsik

faisal: 3an alghala6 yala la kaf 3ala 3aynich

me: enzain ma 3alaina 3ade twadene ma63am hende yu3ana, please 

faisal: ma63am hne? w8asam mustawach nas ygoulun mcdo 3al a8al mu ma63am hendi!::

me: meshtahya flafel w bu6a6 

faisal: okay yala

me: okaayyyy thankyouu :D bas albes joutyy w ayyek

faisal: enzain bser3a

 

re7t lbast joutyy w re7na ma63am hnedy w sharaaynaa 7ag 8abeelaaa i think=)) 

 

me: bas bas f9ail yala khan nred dekht w ye3t w almusalsal eb yebda ba3ad 10 degayeeg

faisal: gelt shay al7eeen ana? yala emshay

 

me: la la 7asha ma gelt shay wala mashkour 3ala rase khashmek bas khashmek=))

faisal: jedame yala jedame=)) 

we9lna albait w ga3dna nakeel w n6ale3 almusalsaal..

faisal: yala te9b7en 3ala 5ayr w bacher goumaw mbacher 3afya 3ashan alzwara..

me: ehh enshallah w enta men ahlaaa

ra7 nam w 3ugba eb shway re7t anam ana..

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3azam's [•p.o.v•] 

ghareba njoud ma galtly shay ma3ana ana ele dazlha almsg.. w ehya ghalatly ena betgoul kel shay.. yemkim daraat? la musta7eel!! alyoum ashoufha w yemkin tgoul.. bas ana ba3aref shay shnu alhadaf men kel hatha? shnu alhadaf men kel ele ga3ed asaweh, laish ana me7tar menhoum.. wala 7aram albent ma sawaitly shay.. laish ga3ed asawe chthy.. 3azam e97a e97a!!!!! tara yemkin ele ga3ed tsaweh blbent yerja3lik.. aldenya dawaraa.. wala met7asef gad sha3ar rase ma adre shasawe.. khal adeg 3ala saloum w agoula khala9..

me: hala wala saloum, kaif al7al? 

salman: hala fek 7abeeby, 6aayeeeb w ent shlounik?

me: 3asah, bkhaayr al7imidiallah! ela agoulik

salman: amer?

me: mayamer 3allayk 3adu bas kent bagoulik ena khala9..

salman: khala9 shnu?

me: ba6alt salfat almsgs a7es 7araam wala mane gader thamery y2anbnyy! 

salman: sheft yal khebel, cham mara agoulik ana ma tesma3 bas zain 3eraft men nafsik!!! 

me: 7asayt malha thanb w aana ma adre 3ala shnu me7taar!!!

salman: khala9 ndezlha msg ya3ne?

me: adzlik meta tdez almsg okay? 

salman: khala9 w bas hatha ele tsawe ehwa al9a7, bas la7tha enta t7ebha?

me: ma adre bas twansnyy jad.. w elsannhaa hatha yabela ga6=))

salman: enzayn chub banzel ba7ar 

me: 7maaaar mu kaf----- *6ooooo6 6ooo6 6oo6* laaa saloum 9ak 3al walda mu chthy y9kun altalephone ya3ne=)) almuhem ley galatly njoud alyoum bagoulaha kel shay.. bas yarab ma t3a9eeb..

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back to njoud's [•p.o.v•]

its a new day..

a new start for everything..

thank god.. 

me: raghad yalaaa bnrou7 zwara bser3a badlaay 

raghad: bashray omich

me: shgeltayy?

raghad: *eg3edat bser3a chenha estaw3ebat eshtagalat weya wayeha almtafakh* haa asfa asfa now agoum yala bas 6l3ay hdoume w al7jab alabyath

me: kaaaaaaak okaaaay bser3aaa

raghad: zain lat7neeen..

ba3ad sa3a yala sharefat alameera raghad.. 

me: chan ta2akhartay akthar? 5u ana w f9ail ma 3endena shegel ghayr nn6erech:)

faisal: yabelech 6ag bas almushkela ma agdar ajesech, tukfain njoud 6geehaaa

raghad: hoooob hoooob ashoufkoum 6abaytaw fenee, chub yala w f9ail tukfa tukfa tukfa khan nrou7 bl rubu3 aw al wranger tukfaaa

f9ail: shtabeen blrubu3 entaay? 9baay? 

raghad: ehh ehh 9bay yala emsh

me: 7imidalaah welsheker w al7een eb ay sayara bnrou7 khal9aw

fai9al: wrangler

raghad: HEEEEYAAA 3ala rase bu alfa9lyyyyy

fai9al: hablaaa w rabe yala khal9ene 

raghad: hehe 6al3a 3allaaaik 

fai9al: la a9edech bas

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back to 3azam's [•p.o.v•]

we9alt alzwara wela algahoum wa9leen gablee.. bas tharoury agoul 7ag njoud khala9.. dashayt salamt 3ala kel men w alas2ela ele kel mara "ha meta eb tt5araj" "7a6 3anik 3ala wa7da haa" w so much more.. almuhem ma 3alay lazem arou7 7ag njoud al7eeen!

me: njoud lazem agoulich shay

njoud: ana ele lazem agoulik shay=))

me: njoud la2 khalene at7acha awal

njoud: tara ga3ed tkar3ne please ta7acha!

me: njoud shoufay ele bagoulaa al7eeen ma adre shloun sawaita w abech ma t3a9been please

njoud: okay yala goul!

me: njoud ana .........

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comment please xo

love you all<3

 

مجردُ كلمات احببت الافصاحَ عنها.. random post💗

كنتُ في طريقي عائده إلى المنزل، و إذا به يخطرُ على بالي، مرّ على بالي ذكراه.. ذكرى صباح.. ليس كأي صباح.. صباحٌ كسر قلبي.. صباحٌ لم يرحم ضعفي.. صباح؟ هه.. حينَ قالَ لي على عجل.. "سررتُ بالتحدث معكِ، إلى اللقاء.."  ومن هنا.. انتهى كل شيء.. لحظه صحيح.. لم يكن بيننا شي أصلاً.. اي كل شي.. ماذا اقول أنا..  فقط انتهيتُ انا وانتهت صلاحيه قلبي..

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يومها كنتُ جالسه في سريري كأي يوم.. حينَ طرقَ ذكرهُ على نافذه أفكاري.. جلست أتذكر ذكرياتي معه.. هذا حالي منذ عام.. عامٌ كامل وقلبي معلقٌ به ومعه.. أُحبه.. لكن ماذا عساي أنّ أقول؟ ليسَ باليد حيله.. أصبر.. و أنتظر.. أتحملُ الغياب.. والاشتياق.. والغيره.. 

*please tell me what do you think it would really make my day x &its written by me, if you want to take it just give me credits xo